It can be a difficult affair to part ways with a loved one, and letting go seems impossible more often than not.
It gets awkward when you know that your ex-lover has not moved on and is still “hoovering” when you manage to move on.
Although easy to confuse with genuine reconciliation efforts, hoovering is a technique of coercion that could be used by others to suck you back into a potentially toxic relationship.
There are signs to watch out for in case you are wondering if your ex is hoovering you.
calling you Out of the blue
With the sinking feeling in t pit of your stomach, a random text or call from an ex without any heads up will leave you. It can be an effort to reel you back into a toxic relationship or dig up memories of nostalgia. Look out for questions in hopes of going back there to help you head down memory lane.
Acting in repentance
They will be unnecessarily apologetic for past events and attempt to reassure you that they have altered. Such apologies are performative when used as a hoovering technique and have deceptive undertones.
Reaching out on important dates.
Your ex is extremely likely to know important dates and holidays for you, so reaching out to you during those times may be either genuine or another way to ensure that you respond to their messages or phone calls. It could be a way of getting you to lower your guard by calling you on a birthday or sending a congratulatory email.
Declaring their undying love
It is no brainer that if they make proclamations of love, your ex really wants you.
Showering you with gifts
We all speak different of languages of love and if you happen to receive gifts, beware of an ex who shows you extravagant or costly gifts. These gestures may be a deceptive technique intended to make them feel indebted to you.
To get to you by using other people.
Beware of the hoover by proxy, which can happen when the victim is played by your ex and attempts to get other people on their behalf to meet you.